photo: Martha G Brady

It’s the middle of January and I haven’t gotten in gear for my blog…for the New Year. For that matter, I wasn’t really in gear for the last few months of last year. But I’m slowly moving in the right direction.

I felt overwhelmed, depressed, alone and facing brick wall after brick wall last year. Most people who saw me regularly may not have been aware that this was the case, but it was. I had so many areas of my life that were out of control and the ability to corral them seemed beyond me. By December, I felt like I was jammed up against a brick wall with no place to move and my options lessening by the minute. In retrospect, I realize I was often in a state of panic.

New and unexpected options opened to me that have given me a chance to breathe and think

At that time, a few more options opened up to me that gave me a chance to breathe. I had no idea how much they would help. Now I can think through options more logically and with less panic.    stop  

I’ve started working on the most pressing issues one at a time. The exercise class we were attending sporadically, is becoming a routine. I just started a nutrition class because dietary rules keep changing so much it keeps me confused! I think the class will be a good fit.

Before I started the class, I stopped the regular consumption of chai lattes. It has resulted in a 5 pound weight loss in only 2 weeks! That was quite impressive…and encouraging.

So the baby steps are moving forward. I’m very happy about that for sure. My mind is feeling more hopeful and less foggy. I guess that will help me feel more able to function as I clear out more things I must work on.

Facing my excuses that keep me from change and hold me back from trusting GOD in the ways and places I need to is helping me this week.

This past week, our Spring Bible study started and I’m very hopeful about the change that will come as a result of the work I’ll be putting into it. Gospel Identity: Discovering Who You Really Are by Serge (formerly World Harvest Mission).  I had a come-to-Jesus moment, when I read the list titled Excuses: How to be right and look good. I can’t find it online to link it, but it is very convicting for those of us who like to think we’re doing ok and function in a low-grade life of sin all the time rather than deal with it more forcefully. It forced me to deal with all my excuses I give myself for not moving forward in obedience and for continuing my sinful behavior patterns.

As I’m slowly digging out of a deep hole I was in emotionally and spiritually, I expect to be writing more and getting more planned series going on my blog again. I’m sorry to have been away for so long. It has just been that kind of year that has been difficult.

An interesting side note…Ron has been improving the past couple of weeks as well.

The interesting thing is that since I have been improving, Ron has too. He has been more awake and alert than he has been in quite awhile. He has been waking up in the mornings, doing activities, and then getting an afternoon nap. I don’t know why the change has happened, but I’ll take it for as long as it continues.

Blessings to you as this New Year continues.

Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus,
the great shepherd of the sheep,
by the blood of the eternal covenant, 
equip you with everything good that you may do his will,
working in us that which is pleasing in his sight,
through Jesus Christ,
to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.

Hebrews 13:20-21

Five Minute Friday-where we write write for 5 minutes or so on one word and don’t look back.

**I cheated on the way I used middle this week, but I had to catch up with you all in some way.