photo: CCO public domain graphic: Martha G. Brady
One thing that has taken me by surprise about old age
Has been that it feels quite different from what I expected!
One thing that has taken me by surprise about old age has been that it feels quite different from what I expected! Share on XI expected to feel wise, serene…and mature.
I don’t.
I expected to feel wise, serene...and mature. I don't. Share on X
I feel like I always did.
When I walk into a room, I feel as insecure as I always did.
It’s just that now, I don’t give in to my insecurity.
I talk to myself a lot!
I remind myself that no one is looking at me.
But I try to suck in my gut anyway and I try to look decent.
And mostly, I try to set people around me at ease.
When I walk into a room, I feel as insecure as I always did. It's just that now, I don't give in to my insecurity. Share on X
Are they comfortable?
Do they know the people around them?
Is there anything I can do to make them more comfortable and at ease?
Then I will do it…within reason. stop
I find that when I get up from sitting too long
It is more difficult. I’m stiffer and sorer.
In colder, damper weather, I ache more than when I was younger.
And I’m often surprised at the older lady looking back at me in the mirror.
One thing I enjoy especially, is seeing the rest of many of the stories
I saw the beginning or middle of.
That is interesting and often fun.
There are sad times too, of course.
It has reinforced my confidence that GOD really does keep us in His hand.
He does complete our salvation in ways we often aren’t aware of. (cf. Philippians 1:6)
At times we are weak. We don’t hold up our end of the bargain.
Or we wouldn’t if it were an equal partnership.
But this is a different situation!
GOD, through Jesus Christ, provided for our salvation and redemption
In a totally one-sided way!
We have nothing to bring to the table.
All we have to offer is our sin and brokenness.
He offered full forgiveness for sin, past, present and future…
And the opportunity to stand before a holy GOD dressed in the righteousness of Christ!
Now we are part of the line of the people of GOD that streams down through the ages of time.
Who have chosen to walk with Christ rather than be part of this temporal world system around us.
And even that has been because of His work in us.
Some day, I will be surprised as I open my eyes in glory.
Breathing that heavenly air and enjoying the light that comes from GOD Himself
In His heavenly Kingdom.
May He bless and keep you!
So beautiful. I know how you feel about aging. I don’t feel the time passing or even seem to realize it is going, gone. I feel like a little child staring up at a great big world still. Scared at times, lonely. Then Christ my redeemer shines. Thanks for inspiring me to look at aging in a new light. Every year marks a year I grow closer to Him.
mary, i often feel like a child in that sense too! there are still so many new things to explore and learn about…despite my aches and pains:)
LOL! Yeah… I am still holding out for being wise, serene, and mature! 😉
Great post!
glad you enjoyed it kerrilee:) blessings! martha
I’m disappointed- I was hoping I might feel wise and serene and mature one day! 🙂
I think there is a lot of wisdom though in what you say about insecurity – feeling it but not giving into it. It’s easy for insecurity to cause us to focus on ourselves but that’s a great way to turn it round and think about what we can do to help other people feel at ease.
haha carly:) maybe you will be serene and mature. it just hasn’t worked that way for me so don’t count on it:) i think the wisdom will work out in different ways as i illustrated:)
Such an interesting post, Martha. I’m a few years behind you, but I still struggle with the insecurities of my younger years. I keep hoping I’ll overcome them as I grow. To a degree, I have. I’m beginning to feel the effects of my body getting older, and it’s not fun (as you know 😉 ). I guess we learn to lean on the Lord for they physical and mental and emotional and spiritual challenges and pray we grow in the grace and knowledge of Him, eh?
I enjoyed your post today. 🙂
thanks jeanne:) i think we learn to talk to ourselves about those insecurities…like “Martha, remember who you are in Christ.” or “Martha, you realize these people don’t care about you b/c they are too worried about themselves.” or whatever else you need to say to yourself…even if it is funny. truthfully, most people are so concerned about how they look and the impression they are making that they usually don’t notice your goofs…unless you say something that massively hurts their feelings of course.
Yes, I agree, aging doesn’t always happen they way we imagined!
Great post! Happy Friday to you!
it’s definitely something we have no control over is it rachel?
Yes, THIS: “Some day, I will be surprised as I open my eyes in glory. Breathing that heavenly air and enjoying the light that comes from GOD Himself In His heavenly Kingdom.”
pretty cool isn’t it Tara? since it has nothing to do with my accomplishments, but His, I’m not even being arrogant to believe I’ll be there…just trusting in His promises. cool:)
Amen, sister! Right with you on nearly every word! I know that I never really anticipated what came next in aging. My parents did not live as long as I have, so I only have the memories of aging relatives through my childhood eyes. Looking for blessings is the only way for me these days.
hi martell:) didn’t we meet at the FMF conference? i’m with you. i never tho’t much about what it would be like to be old either. i somehow tho’t i’d always be youngish:) funny! my dad died suddenly in his 50’s and my mom lived into her middle 80’s. i haven’t made it that far yet:) finding blessing is a good way to spend our time now isn’t it?
We did meet up! I’ve been quite sporadic lately with FMF because of some chronic health issues and the book I’m writing. Look forward to reading more of your posts.
well, glad you stopped by martial:)