photo and graphic: Martha G. Brady
Being happy is something we all enjoy. Often, we relish the joy of it. We love knowing all is well. Maybe something has gone especially well or a great life event has happened. But there are times, when I am full of joy, that I really don’t want to have to descend into the sadness of another person. I may even resent it.
Evidently, part of living in harmony with each other involves being happy with those who are happy, no matter how my life is going. Then weeping with those who weep. It’s not our job to make the grieving happy or to bring down the happy into our gloom. It deepens us to share in the grief of another, to suffer alongside them instead of trying to make them happy or minimize their pain.
It's not our job to make the grieving happy or bring down the happy into our gloom. Share on XLive in harmony with each other by being in tune with them
Somehow, this is all part of the way the community of Believers functions. Blessing those who persecute me; Praying that GOD will bless them; Being happy with the joys of others and joining them in their sadnesses.
It deepens me to share in the grief of another…to suffer with them instead of trying to make them happy. Share on XAlong with that is to enjoy ordinary people without thinking I know it all! Does that sound different from the US church? In many pockets, yes. In many places, we want stars to align ourselves with. But the teaching here is to look for ordinary people. Hmmm. stop
What advice could be better or more practical?
Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them;
pray that God will bless them.
Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.
Live in harmony with each other.
Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people.
And don’t think you know it all!
Romans 12:14-16 NLT
Martha, I so appreciate this post. And what you said here: “It deepens me to share in the grief of another…to suffer with them instead of trying to make them happy.” This spoke to me because it’s so true. It’s not my job to make someone happy. It’s my privilege to walk alongside them and encourage them. And when I can do this with an open heart, I am deepened. It takes time, humility, and a desire to love like Jesus does.
Great post!
it’s true, but i am also aware of my fails in this regard as i read this through. despite my fails here, the truth of what i wrote still stands. thanks so much for stopping by jeanne.
What a great post Martha! In such a strange twisted kind of way it is a blessing to grieve with others at times. It is also a blessing to know others are weeping when we are weeping too.
i think it’s all part of GOD’s upside-down economy…you know, the one where those who lose their lives find them, those who give up seeking power and glory, find fulfillment, generally, the way up, is down. it is very much upside-down and counter-intuitive for sure!
As those who are in Christ, we are able to find blessing in being able to comfort those who are weeping. it makes no sense for sure! blessings girl:)
Great post, and a wonderful, truth-filled perspective, Martha! And a perfect scripture to go with HAPPY. I appreciate this timely reminder as I relate to others in my life. Thank you! Have a blessed day!
thanks julie:) it’s a little old, but i bumped into it and it illustrated what i wanted perfectly. we are with our oldest granddaughter a few years ago. blessings:)
Recently my wife said to me, going out the door to a company-organized baseball game outing, “I feel bad going out and having fun for the evening while you’re here alone, in horrible pain.”
Well, I was in horrible pain, but I wasn’t alone, for one thing (a LOT of dogs)…and what good would it do for her to stay home and be with me in the pain? I could manage things; practicality wasn’t the issue.
What was she going to do, sit and hold my hand? There’s no need for that. She has business relationships to build, and a camaraderie at work to reinforce…and a ball game to just plain enjoy.
I appreciate sympathy and empathy, but I sure don’t want to drag anyone down a road of pain, despair, and hopelessness. Anyone who comes here, even though I’m not doing well and it’s really obvious these days, I want them to go out whistling “Yellow Submarine”.
And if I am grieving – and I AM, in a sense, for my own lost future – I don’t want to ‘share’ my grief. A pat on the back and a “Hey, dude, I’m sorry, wish this wasn’t happening!” is really enough.
(And if they don’t LIKE Yellow Submarine I don’t care…that is what they MUST whistle. Period.)
Don’t think I said this too well; a bit ragged at the moment.
#1 at FMF this week.
https://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2016/08/your-dying-spouse-190-mustard-seed-of.html
actually, andrew, this post only covers part of the story. it is reminding us to pay attention to the people around us and not try to put on a happy face when weeping is more appropriate.
however, when a person is in a long term situation of illness/caretaking, they need to have breaks…getting away/humor/whatever. to get a chance to breath or to get energized.
that’s what close friends are for. they can help us laugh and get those breaks…or touch those deep places that need to be touched.
blessings to both of you as you walk this difficult road.
So true! One of my fave quotes in Jennifer Dukes Lees new book is “The God who fave you your smile is the same God who gave you your tear ducts!” This quote helps me remember that at times w all experience grief and can have a hard time finding our happy. I’m in the 5 spot this week.
great quote tara:) i think the point of this passage is to tell us that we don’t have to keep a happy face on all the time…or try to keep a happy face on all the people around us. it is a helpful emphasis!