Trying harder would not have gotten me through the past couple of weeks in our house. It has been hard. Monday, July 24, at 4 AM, Ron woke up with the worst chills I have seen in a long time. He crawled under the covers and continued to shake and chatter. I knew we were headed to the ER, so I jumped up and got dressed. His skin was cold but I knew before long, he was going to be HOT!
Trying harder would not have gotten me through the past couple of weeks in our house. Share on XI took my morning meds, dressed and got presentable looking. I fixed my bag with computer and chargers and other items I need for keeping me busy while I wait. I tossed his wallet (for ID and insurance), in my purse. took off his watch and left it at home along with his hearing aids (too easy to get lost or stolen). I left him in pj’s and undershirt, tossed on his slippers. By then the chills were a little less, even though he had vomited twice. We grabbed a towel and bowl and headed for the car. stop
At that time of morning, the road is totally empty. The lights were totally in my favor and we were at the ER in just under 10 minutes. They took him in while I parked the car. I’m getting into a routine now. That morning I found a great spot 2 spaces from the ER.
On arrival, his temp was 102.4. After the testing was done, the outcome was that Ron had pneumonia in the lower lobe of one of his lungs. Blood cultures had already been taken, so two IV antibiotics were started and he was admitted to the hospital on the respiratory floor. A low dose of oxygen was started. He was settled in bed, admitted, had his lunch and was napping. Then I headed for home to get what he needed for the hospital.
The next couple of days were filled with my staying with him during the day, doing laundry at night and falling asleep on the couch at home. I have learned that I need to eat decently and get the rest I need so I don’t rush to get back to the hospital in the early morning.
His hospitalist was very kind and told me that if he was there and I wasn’t, he would call during the visit and talk to me then. That was very reassuring after our horrific hospitalization last time (resulting in the change to a new doctor). A week ago Wednesday, Ron was discharged with an oral antibiotic and we went home with a very simple discharge plan.
Then alarming symptoms developed!
This Wednesday, on our way to visit the doctor for our follow-up visit, Ron’s mental status changed completely! He forgot he had been in the hospital and couldn’t remember much of what had happened in the past week. He also was forgetting my answers to his questions and asking the same questions over and over. It was not only weird, it was alarming!
Needless to say, that took over the visit. The doctor checked out his lungs of course. They sounded fine. But there was the chance he could be having another stroke despite the fact that he had no weaknesses on either side, so he felt the best decision for Ron was to go to the ER and be checked out. Of course, we got in right away! They checked everything out. They ruled out infections (which often cause a change in mental status in older adults). They also checked out his head. Everything was fine. We were discharged at about 10 PM. We got home and he was fine.
I felt like a wrung out dishcloth! I still do! It wasn’t until yesterday when I talked to his doctor, that I got some insight on what happened. He thinks it had to do with a side effect of the antibiotic that can happen. Even though he was finished with them, some may have been in his bloodstream from his low kidney function. It is called antibiotic delirium. It was a fairly mild case, but with added fluids and time, he is coming out of it and gradually remembering events that he had forgotten. It seems to have been transient.
Yes, I try to stay calm when all these things happen, but the exhaustion after, tells me that it takes a toll. The encouragement I get comes when I tell people on Facebook and in person what is happening (after I text my daughters).
The prayers and kind words help when trying harder doesn’t do any good!
I get a flood of people telling me they are praying for us. It is people from our present, recent and distant past. It is very encouraging to know they are praying. In these times when I become more and more aware of my weakness and the ability to try harder just isn’t there and won’t really help. I know they are going to the throne for me. It is a support that can’t be explained in any other human arena.
It is the words from a new mother who texts you to offer her nearby home for you to come rest when you need it, or the person who offers a meal, or a young mom who tells you at church that she is praying for you and your husband every day and has a short, encouraging visit with you, along with your dear friends who text, call or the many other kindnesses that come as a result of the Facebook request. I didn’t need them all at the time, but they meant so much.
Prayer is a special and sacred connection to Christ we have as the Church Universal. Share on XIt is a special and sacred connection we have as the Church Universal. It is at times like this that we feel that connection…when trying doesn’t help…when we need the help and support of prayer…and the love of GOD’s people around us. We need the connection to Christ and His power.
Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray.
Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise.
Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church,
and let them pray over him….
Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another,
that you may be healed.
The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.James 5:13-14, 16
Martha, that must have been SCARY. Even with your nursing background! I’m so glad there doesn’t seem to be anything lasting going on with your man. You are right. There are times when trying harder isn’t the answer. Often, it seems like those times are the seasons when God calls us to depend on, to share with, others. Which, of course, means putting our business out there and asking for help. I’m so glad God has surrounded you with family and friends who came alongside you in this time.
Thanks for the update. Those ER visits can be so disconcerting and stressful. I’m so glad things are looking up. Thanks for update.
glad you came by linda:) yes, when i am in the middle of the ER, it seems that i am doing ok. but after? i find out how stressed i really was!
Thanks for posting this — and the reminder of the power of prayer. Sleep is not always a reliable companion, and often I have a sense I am awake for a reason — not to fret but to pray. Prayers of God’s people are source of so much I too easily forget. Thanks again for spelling it out. I ask God to please heal, strengthen and bless you and your husband. Your title about sums up how I can get myself so messed up!
Love in Christ
bwsmith
thanks for stopping by barbara…and for sharing this on fb too:) i find i continually underestimate prayer and my need for as well as its power. yes, i state it all correctly, but the reality of it in everyday life is often not there. as i become more and more aware of my weakness through ron’s illness, it being brought home more strongly.
Stopping by for the first time (FMF #34). I’m sorry for your husband’s health challenges — but so very thankful that you have the Church lifting you in prayer. Consider me part of that group tonight. May the next few weeks be much easier for you both.
thanks susan:) glad you stopped by and thanks for your prayers. hopefully, we are on the upswing for awhile.
I’m sorry you’ve had such a difficult couple of weeks, Martha, but I’m glad you have had people to support you in prayer. It is amazing how we can come together and support one another, and when we want to help and don’t know how often praying is the best thing we can do. I’m glad Ron is doing okay now- praying that continues, and praying for you that you have some time to rest and be restored this week!
thanks lesley:) yes, we have had a lot of rest and restoration. thanks:)
THIS: “It is a special and sacred connection we have as the Church Universal. It is at times like this that we feel that connection…when trying doesn’t help…when we need the help and support of prayer…and the love of GOD’s people around us. We need the connection to Christ and His power.” Praying for you both! I’m in the 5 spot this week.
I read somewhere that we, as a church, should stop saying that the least we can do is pray. Instead, we should be approaching the throne of God in prayer first. I haven’t been keeping up entirely on what’s happening, but I am stopping now to pray for you and Ron.
Hugs,
Melinda
(Your neighbor at FMF)
thanks melinda:) i totally agree! when i feel able to control and manage what is coming at me, i don’t feel the need to pray nearly as much. that is the good side of what id happening. this is not manageable or controllable and i’m much more aware of my own frailty. if it pushes me to pray or ask for prayer, that is all good isn’t it?