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limits

photo: CCO public domain

 

What are my limits?

I live in a country where I am taught that

I have none.

I can go for my dreams!

I can be anything I want to be.

 

But I’m here to tell you that isn’t true.

All of us have limits.

I became aware of some of mine early.

I realized I would never be a model.

It was never going to happen for me.

Given the limits of of a not perfect face

 

What would I be?

I was taught that the important thing was not what was on the outside

But the heart and soul were the important things.

It’s a good thing!

 

As I grew, I learned to reach out to people less fortunate than I

And to develop a growing relationship with Jesus.

For some reason,reaching out wasn’t that difficult.

The lowly and unfortunate liked me and most of the time, I liked them.

Growing with Jesus was a little more difficult, but it happened.

 

But I also wanted to be liked by the cool people, the fun people.

That didn’t come so easily.

As time went on, I learned to distinguish which ones were worth seeking after as friends

And which ones would be harmful.                    stop

 

At age 20, I developed epilepsy.

At the time, I wasn’t sure how it would affect my life.

As it turned out, apart from regular medication, my life was rather normal…

Apart from a breakthrough seizure every 7-10 years.

 

Until menopause.

Sadly, we didn’t realize this was the problem or my issues wouldn’t have lasted 4 years.

But suddenly, I started having seizures every month, then every week.

I now knew what it was like to be “an epileptic.”

I now no longer had a seizure in the morning if I had one.

It could happen anytime, anywhere.

My independence was gone.

No more driving…for 4 years…maybe never again!

 

Medications where changed, adjusted, changed again.

Most of the time, I was in a fog.

Of course, I looked fine. I was anything but!

I felt useless. My limits were glaring.

 

The very medication I asked about the first day I saw him!

Suddenly, one day, my doctor looked at my medications again.

He realized one of them needed something to balance it out

To remedy the seizures.

The cause of the seizure had been from menopause! Who knew?

Sure enough, I went months before another seizure.

The new medication was bumped up a little and I went 6 years!

 

Now, my limits come less dramatically.

I use my energy in spurts.

My limits hit me hard.

Now I have to plan ahead

So my limits hit me on a quiet day

Instead of a busy one.

What encourages me as the limits of age and human frailty are in my face?

 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden,
and I will give you rest.
 
Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me,
for I am gentle and lowly in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
 
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30

For consider your calling, brothers:
not many of you were wise according to worldly standards,
not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth.
 
But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise;
God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong;
 
God chose what is low and despised in the world,
even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are,
 
so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.
I Corinthians 1:26-29

He has even used the weaker me to shame the me that wanted strength and honor and wisdom…to realize I need Him and I need others around me. I need to ask for help. I hate it! But I need to ask both for them and for me!

How about you? How do you respond to your limits?